How long until the sun starts burning the flesh of my bones?
I've been working every shift I could get lately, much to the goodwill ATMs show to me lately; but I'm not sure if it's really doing me much good, as I hardly get to see a lot of sunlight due to working at night and therefor sleeping most of the day, and with days starting to turn shorter and the weather having been a major bitch around here in the past two weeks or so, I start feeling like some creepy creature of the night that turns to ashes as the first ray of sunlight hits my skin.
Incidentally, the weather's said to improve, at least for the next couple of days, so I'll have plenty of opportunities to test myself for sun allergy.

On Saturday, I'm going to attend a good friend's wedding and I'm not sure if I really wanna go there. The wedding gift I was asked to work out is not even close to adequate in my opinion, and I feel I shouldn't have taken on that job in the first place, not being sure I could handle it. I've done my best though, and that will have to suffice I'm afraid.
But even apart from the gift issue, that wedding's kinda stress for me, as I couldn't find anyone to cover my Sunday night shift at the pub, so it'll be a short Saturday night for me with a 2-hours car-ride back home in the night and catching an early train on Sunday. I'd love to meet with NH too, but I doubt I'll find any time for that, so I guess I'll have to hope that she really does come visit me at some point at my place before the new semester starts; I'm secretly doubting it though...

On the good side, I've managed to hunt down a new flat, which is closer to uni and closer to the pub, which is good because it means that I can still work while getting to bed earlier after I've closed and having to get up later to go to uni! Ain't that a win/win, eh?

Anyways, didn't sleep much last night, gonna grab a couple of hours now or I'm gonna drop dead, even though it probably means I won't be able to sleep tonight again. A vicious circle, really.

From rags to riches
Incredibly enough, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and it seems to be not the approaching train!
Trying to get my bank account back to small digits with a PLUS sign in front of it (any amount of small digits) has accompanied for so long by now that I'm almost feeling kind of sad to say that I've actually done it. It's true though, I'm back out of the red numbers and gone are the days of constant fear of ATMs that want to bite my arm off for walking too close past them (or swallow me whole). Guess I can really start thinking about actually saving some money now, as until now, it never was really "saved up" but rather "not spent"...
Also, I've started working a second night a week at the pub and my boss offered me a third night already. Seems I'm doing a job there.

My plans regarding the move to Leiden/.nl are coming to a rather less nice end though.
I got a letter from the Admission Office in which they informed me that I was accepted for the Bachelor's Bridging Programme, a preparatory year, but not yet for the Uni. Unfortunately, I don't receive any students' aid for that year and after calculating for a short bit I faced some really nasty numbers that made me think of biting ATMs a damn lot. 8500 Euro for the rent/living expenses in that year is more than I have to pay off from students' aid for the whole 4 years of Uni that are forseeable, and I really don't want to come out of Uni with a 15k Euro debt on my shoulders (8.5k for prep year, plus the students' aid part).
So the odds of me staying here and somehow face the dreadful monster they call a Bachelor's degree in this country are pretty good.

Ah well. Time for a late-night snack and some sleepies for me now. More news as it comes along.

Ta-taa.

Hello World
I'm still out here, I've just been occupied.
My life's a bit of a mess at the moment, with a still lingering uncertainly regarding my change of university and location, complete chaos in my living quarters (I'm not going to call this mess a room), a weird social life and a yet weirder sex life.

The latest info from Leiden University is that I'll get a call from the student coordinator responsible for me within the coming week, and apparently, I'll get to know then whether or not I'm accepted. The according letter should be arriving within 1-2 weeks, according to the people at the International Office. Did I already mention how sick all this waiting makes me?!

My room's been a mess for weeks now and every time I clean it up, it's a mess within mere hours again. My mom used to say that the state my room is in perfectly reflects my state of mind and I can't honestly disagree.
The waiting for response from Leiden Uni, growing dislike of one of my flatmates, the felt need to get away from this place and find one where I'm the only one I have to worry about, an overall state of emotional self-pity and exaggerated cynicism towards my surroundings and last but not least being told that no sense of jealousy is close to the worst thing a guy can have sort of adds up to a generally miserable and uncomfortable tenor of my every-day-life at the moment.

I decided to get rid of quite a lot stuff I just don't need anymore, mainly books I've read a couple of times but don't touch anymore and some spare computer parts. I'll probably get the latter sold to my younger brother, he might want to play around and try his tweaking skills on the remainders of what once were 2 PCs.
I should also reduce the amount of clothes that are stacking in my wardrobe, but I seem to have a "womens' problem" here with not being able to decide on what has to go and what's allowed to stay...

Ah well. Hopefully, I'll be able to go to Mannheim for a couple of days in the coming week and see NH again, feels like ages since I last saw her, although I think in reality it's only been 6-7 weeks or so. If I ever manage to get my tongue unglued when I'm around her, I'll try to come up with the topic of "her and me" when I see her the next time, it's been way overdue that this is being talked through in the open and without being the shy guy I usually am when it comes to emotional topics and expression of feelings.

Now, since I've not had a really good nightful of sleep this weekend so far (with partying on Friday night, work/party on Saturday and work tonight), I'm gonna try and grab some sleepies now.

Peace. Out.